Cry me a river *bad language sorry

Boy, when you're being a slackass (new word) you stop b logging.
I hate that I "blog" anyhow.
Jesus.
Really in a crapass funk.
Now I has my last hassle with my PMD over a month ago.
The surgeons office was very nice to go to bat for me.
All I have to do is get the psych appointment over with.
He's in month 2 of a layoff ( I hate his contract work)
We do NOT have the few hundred dollars to have the stupid evaluation.
I work with the surgeons. They should know I'm not crazy!
They should know I know the ins and outs and innards of the freaking surgery!
I have scrubbed with them for Christs sake on open GB and Rouxs for years!
I'm not having either one of those.
I don't know. Am I supposed to have this freaking surgery?
It would have been a year already...if there was no 6 month bullshit and my crappy doctors lagging.
Oh, and exercise, yeah R I G H T! I'm accountable right, because I am logging right? BS!
I haven't logged anything for a month.
WTF is going on with me?
Boy, cry me a river!
I hate when people whine and now I know why.
Get the fuck over it already!
Wonder the the shrink will take Visa!?

Turkey day without family.
I envisioned Turkey day with my mother, maybe his, Sammy, the kids, etc etc even Amber or Neil.
Went to a friends for Dinner. It wasn't the same.
Why did we sign another lease?
Why could't he bite the bullet and just get down here already.
Change your freaking career already.
I'm sick of driving back and forth.
I'm sick of working for whomever needs me.
Sure, it isn't boring but it certainly is tedious.
I have started off the day actually headed in the wrong direction not knowing which hospital to show up at.
I'm giving it a few months and then I think I will not return to NJ.
I'm working after next week for a few weeks straight.
Then back again.
P I T A !